lookingforlissa

Escape your life for a little while — come play in mine.

Archive for April, 2012

Happy Easter!

Posted by Lissa on April 9, 2012

Good morning everyone! I hope you all had a wonderful and relaxing Easter!

I’m not gonna lie – my Easter started off as a huge bummer. My mom and stepdad were flying down to spend Easter weekend with us; I had all the dishes planned and had done the shopping and was ready to sandblast – er, clean – the house and we were going to Epcot on Monday … and my mom came down with a killer flu. WAH! There was a fair amount of crying — well, no, I wasn’t CRYING, it’s just that my eyes kept leaking. Stupid eyes. Anyway, she’s feeling better, and, well, we had a much more RELAXING weekend than planned, so it’s okay.

We still had Mike’s parents and two of his uncles over for Easter dinner, and that was lovely. (Especially the uncle who was intently watching the Master’s and cheering like he was at a peewee football game. I.e., cheering like his shouts of encouragement and jeers of choking were actually going to affect the outcome. It was great.)

Of course, since we had two fewer people than expected, my spread went from “too much food” to “holy crap I can’t put out ALL the food I bought or they’ll have me committed to the mental ward.” So I skipped the caprese salad appetizer and stuck with potato chips, tortilla chips and fresh salsa, two kinds of chips and three kinds of cheese, and a platter of cut veggies with low-fat spinach dip. (Fat free sour cream, low-fat mayo, french onion soup mix and frozen chopped spinach, if you’re wondering.) For dinner we served up smoked pulled pork (yay for making Mike cook outside!), spaghetti with Italian sausages (the sauce starts with tomato puree and peeled tomatoes and cooked about six hours), salad, roasted cauliflower and Italian bread.

And dessert? Well, Mike and I made a quick strawberry-picking run yesterday (which was supposed to be a blueberry picking run only there weren’t any) and I used the recipe off the side of the puff pastry box:

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(That’s two strawberry napoleons with chocolate-dipped strawberries down the middle.)

We sent home a bunch of food with the folks so my fridge is now only overfull instead of gorged-to-bursting. (I need to eat a lot of fresh veggies this week.)

I hope you all also had a relaxing holiday filled with good food and family!

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Boy howdy, this makes me want to subscribe to the local news rag

Posted by Lissa on April 4, 2012

I pulled up behind this van the other day:

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My absolute favorite part is where the “Orlando Sentinel” sticker has been covered up by the “Corporations Are Not The People” sticker. They’re not the people, they’re just how I make my livelihood . . . so down with ’em!

The one thing I agree with? He doesn’t seem to be picky about the Republican candidates. Although whereas he wants to pink slip all of them, I’d hire any one of then to replace our current president.

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A horrifying question of bathroom etiquette

Posted by Lissa on April 2, 2012

Let me pose you a hypothetical situation, dear readers. (It’s hypothetical, really it is. Nothing like this ever happened to me. I’m imagining the whole thing. Really.)

Let us say that you’re invited to a dinner party. Let us further say that the host has overnight guests, including the Guest of Honor (the reason the party is being thrown). When you arrive, one of these overnight guests (perhaps the GoH, perhaps not) is occupying the bathroom (#Occupy!). When he finally gets out, there are a few other guests who, like you, need to use the facilities, but they all let you go first because you’re the only girl and they’re like that.

And finally, let us say that when you get to the bathroom – knowing that several people will be using it after you – and you look in the toilet, there is a very clear. . . EXCREMENT TRAIL . . . running down the back of the bowl.

This trail does not disappear with repeated flushing. You look around frantically for toilet-cleaning materials but none are in evidence.

So. According to the Official Rules of Emily Post, what is the proper thing to do?

1) Shrug your shoulders, do your business and rejoin the party. So the next guest will think YOU left the trail; so what?

2) Leave the bathroom, closing the door behind you, and hunt down the host (who is in the middle of preparing dinner). Explain to him – and everyone around him – why you need cleaning materials. Ignore the buzzkill that you’ve inflicted on the party and further ignore the fact that you will be the butt – ugh – of all jokes with that group for the rest of your life.

3) Wad up a hunk of toilet paper thick enough to protect your fingers but just thin enough to avoid clogging the toilet. Wipe down and erase the trail and flush away the evidence. Wash your hands in super-hot water at least five times, while whimpering.

Tell me, dear readers. What would you do? What do you think I did?

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