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Duke outlaws tipsy hookups, sex with nerds, sex with geeks — well, sex in general.

Posted by Lissa on April 13, 2010

Check out Duke’s new “sexual misconduct” policy:

Real or perceived power differentials between individuals may create an unintentional atmosphere of coercion.

So my question is – why does Duke hate nerds?  And women in general?  And also, men in general?  Because it’s now impossible to have consensual sex with any of those groups.  Individuals may think they’re consenting, sure, but that’s just because they don’t know any better.

Real or perceived power differentials between individuals” — good god a’mighty, have you ever seen a broader, more general classification?  Some feminists think it’s impossible for a woman to be as powerful a man, both physically and culturally; some men think that the campus and rules are structured so that he-said-she-said arguments always go against the men.  And I don’t even have to go into LGBT issues.  So there you go, I just declared 100% of the student population to have a perceived power differential.

Memo to Duke —

I had my (small) share of romance at Ye Olde Liberal Arts School.  Some of my choices were wise, some were not.  Some I regretted, some I didn’t.  But each of those choices was just that — a CHOICE.  A choice *I* made, a choice that belonged to me.

There is ACTUAL sexual assault on campus, you know.  Why not concentrate on that?  Instead of declaring that 100% of your students are victims who can’t make up their own minds?

Sincerely,
Lissa

(h/t Dr. Helen)

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5 Responses to “Duke outlaws tipsy hookups, sex with nerds, sex with geeks — well, sex in general.”

  1. A couple of things. One, Duke sucks. B, one wonders how Liberal Arts establishments actually get anything done – real or perceived – in the larger, non-liberal world (non-liberal in that the lion doesn’t really want to lie down with the lamb), what with all their endless lists of can’t-do things. Really, it’s amazing. This country was set in motion with a skimpy handbook, and Duke may well have a fifteen volume set of rules and regs.

    And “power differentials”? Doesn’t my car have one of those? And more importantly, and I say this as one who went through “romances” and will one day watch his Heiresses do the same: Isn’t learning to deal with such “differentials” another important Life Lesson?

    Oh, and Duke sucks. And now I don’t just say that ‘cos my co-regent attended UNC.

  2. Years ago (many years, I was a kid at the time), the “dear leader” of one of the feminist organizations declaired that “all sex is rape”. She went on to specifically say that even consentual sex in a committed marriage is rape, even if the wife is the one who instigates the sex, she is being raped.

    This has always confused me. If this woman is a feminist, why would she believe that women are such helpless, delecate, silly things who are incapable of deciding for themselves? AND, if women ARE such helpless, delecate, silly things, why would she argue that they should be equal? It was the first time that I realized that some people just plain think differant than other people, and try as I might, I would never be able to understand where they are coming from.

    This thing at Duke seems to be a continuation of that meme.

    The truth of the matter is that women have all of the sexual power. Men tend to have all of the physical power. There are times when the two collide. The outcome is never good. Most of the time, people are able to throw the whole power thing out of the window resulting in some very nice relationships. Does the power imbalance still exist? Yes. Does it matter? Only if one or both of the people in the relationship start using his or her power against the other. Well… let’s get realistic here. The dirty little secret is if the guy uses his (physical) power against the woman society sees that as a problem; however, if the woman uses her sexual power against the man it is excused, after all he DOES have all of that physical power… that he can’t use….

    Dang… now who is raping who?

    s

  3. Brad K. said

    Lissa, you completely misunderstand.

    They don’t want outsiders taking advantage of the Nerds – this is a eugenics program. They want the nerds to restrict their mating habits within that community, to evolve a “super nerd”. What they hope to gain by encouraging women to frolic within their community is anyone’s guess. I would look for hidden cameras in the dorms (and, yes, I did watch “Pretty Smart” just last year).

    Besides, it isn’t good character reinforcement to play clique pranks like “slumming” or doing it “just to be polite.” It might be fun, or good for a laugh, but intimacy should include respect, a reasonable assessment that your partner is a trustworthy and respected, honest person.

  4. Jay G. said

    Simple solution: Get married, have kids, and never have sex again…

  5. I’m with Scotaku, Duke Sucks. (Wife is a Tarheel, and has trained me well)

    I’d imagine my time at UMaine was no different than any other college campus where REAL DEAL Rape and sexual assault was frighteningly common. And now they worry about two people hopping between the sheets and bumping uglies, and then giggling about it afterwords? Seriously?

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