Posted by Lissa on October 21, 2009
Two pieces of advice being solicited this morning, dear readers!
First off . . . how does one choose a holster? I know, I know, try lots of stuff and see how it works . . . but where’s the starting point? There are lots of things one needs to purchase before actually getting a gun (e.g. holster, bulletproof vest or big bucket of sand, cleaning kit, gun safe, etc.). Where do I begin? Which shops do y’all patronize? How do I go about this business WITHOUT dropping a few hundred bucks on experimental holsters that I’ll never use?
And the second piece of advice I’d like today is:
WHAT DO YOU DO WHEN YOUR COWORKER WILL NOT BLOW HER GODS-BEDAMNED NOSE????
The woman in the cube next to mine has severe sinus problems. She continuously sniffles, snorks, and snerks. You can HEAR the gunk in her neb move about as she snorts. It’s absolutely disgusting.
And she does it VERY BLOODY FREQUENTLY. I counted once — in the space of one minute, the longest she went without horking was thirteen seconds.
Mind you, there were a lot of five- and six-second intervals before we made it to that golden thirteen.
I freely admit that I have my fair share of character flaws. It so happens that one of my flaws centers around aural cues such as sniffles — said flaw being that I cannot tune them out. No matter how hard I try to concentrate on my work, I find myself keeping half an ear out for that next, repulsive HNGKKKKKKK inhale.
It actually got bad enough that I broke all sorts of work etiquette rules and offered her a tissue. Very politely, very sweetly, very hesitantly called her name and, when she looked up over the connecting wall, held up a box of tissues and sweetly, hesitantly asked if she needed one.
“Oh,” she said blankly. “No,” she said flatly.
Four seconds later: “CNHNNNKKKKK.”
I’m contemplating wearing my hair down and loose today so that I can hide earplugs.
There’s gotta be a better way. Help me, Readers wan Kanobe — you’re my only hope!!